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i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.
as a casino employee I can confirm this would be terrifying as fuck
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i dont even know what to say
i had blow everything up like 4 times because my eyes are so dilated i still can’t see
The entirety of Wrathia’s plans from chapter five of Ava’s Demon!
All pages are in order from first to last, click through to see the full size!
Ava? Look behind you.
seen on my face book feed(Anti-vaccination, modern)
who has ever thought this ever
Don’t let your children drink water it might make them think drinking other clear liquids is okay do you want your child drinking bleach
don’t let your children walk, it might make them think its okay to walk away from home
Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure not even people who use heroin believe it is beneficial.
Don’t let your child breathe air. Studies have shown thatin the event of a fire, children who breathe in air are much more likely to breathe in smoke than children who’ve never breathed air.
Don’t have a child. 100% of children grow up and die. You’re literally condemning your own children to die.
my pizza rolls have begun to sizzle
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING